Hey! My name is Lu!  My name is actually Alyssa but I’ve gone by Lu since I was a little girl. I am married to my best friend Colton and we have two little turds, Evelyn (we call her Evie) who’s four and Harvey who just turned three. Yep you read that right…they are 18 months apart. 

I love to celebrate and find any kind of excuse to do so! My Grandma B is a big party lover so I definitely got that from her.

My loves: 

  • Chocolate chip cookies – my favorite chocolate chip is definitely a CHIP cookie
  • Jazz music – And country and a old school pop and hip-hop so pretty much all genres
  • Baths (I take one every single day) 
  • Minky couture blankets 
  • The mountains – especially in the fall
  • Watching my kids eat (serious weird obsession)
  • Flowers – I usually always have a bunch or two of flowers in my home at all times
  • Italian food – give me all the pasta
  • Road trips – have really only been to California but there’s just something about blasting music and eating junk that is so fun
  • Fall candles – I burn them all year long
  • Trashy reality shows – Housewives of Beverly Hills are probably my fav
  • Disneyland – most magical place on earth, tell me I’m wrong.

WOW did I just explain a typical Utah mom? Yes. Yes I did! And I’m proud of it!

I have always had a love and need to create.   When I was just a young girl I would rip up my moms magazines and save all the pretty home decor and DIYs in a binder. (Before Pinterest of course) I had a wedding, flower and an interior design binder from magazines like  cottages and bungalows, romantic home, better home and gardens. Oh! And of course Martha Stewart.  I always dreamt of the day I would have my own home I could decorate and hopefully a business creating beauty, of some sort.

I fell in love with flowers when I turned sixteen. I got a job working at a flower shop and I realized how important it was to me to be surrounded by never ending creativity and beauty. From there on out I have worked in the floral industry, and though it’s not all cupcakes and roses (it’s actually a very high stress and draining job) I loved it.

When I turned 25 I married my high school sweet heart and love of my life, Colton. A year later we bought our first home and soon after I got pregnant with our little Evie girl.  Our home is a little two bedroom 1,200 sq. ft home and has been quite the fixer upper! My husband is super handy, so I came up with the design and he did all the hard work.  It’s still a work in progress (what house isn’t) but we love it! It’s small, cozy and perfect for our little family. 

When I had Evie I had a realllly hard time adjusting. But why? I had dreamt of having a little family of my own since I was a young girl. All I ever wanted was to be a mom and wife so why was I struggling?  I felt so alone, embarrassed, and selfish for feeling this way.  I started having terrible and scary thoughts and to top it off, my milk never really came in. I had a lot of pressure to breast feed and no matter how hard I tried, my milk just never came in. Being a first time mom I felt defeated and hopeless. The scary thoughts continued to  grow. I became lost, mean and well terrified to be alone. The things that used to bring me joy no longer did.  I hardly recognized the person in the mirror. This went on for months. One night while I was pleading for help from God on the laundry room floor, I had a feeling to do more of what used to bring me joy.  I didn’t even know how to do that?  It was exhausting just thinking about doing an arrangement or diy.   I ended up forcing myself to do little projects here and there. I remember this specific diy I did, I recognized the feeling of joy while doing it. I cried and bottled that up and kept going. I ended up getting out of my comfort zone started taking pics of my home, diys and sharing them on Instagram.  I slowly came out of my rut and started feeling like myself again.  Once I was seeing more clear I realized I most definitely had  postpartum depression. When you’re that low and things are foggy you don’t see how bad you are. I seriously just thought I was just an ungrateful brat.  Soon after that I got pregnant with Harvey. Though excited I was also so nervous! The fear of becoming depressed again was terrifying! 

Unfortunately after having Harvey, I again got post partum depression. This time it was worse. I won’t go into details but it was scary times. I knew what helped me the last time, but this time I couldn’t fathom doing any of it. I couldn’t even get out of bed in the mornings. I would just cry and cry and eat my feelings. My poor babies and husband. I know it wasn’t easy on them. I again felt so alone and embarrassed.  I didn’t really tell anyone how low I was. I kept thinking I would be able to kick it on my own.  My husband knew I needed help and found me a counselor. Going weekly helped me understand what was going on in my brain! Soon after I started to push myself to work out and meditate. It was a slow start at first, but it grew into something I looked forward to everyday and ended up being extremely helpful. I slowly started feeling stronger and stronger and knew I needed to let go of anything that was making me unhappy.  Unfortunately, I had to let go of some friendships and well, that left me feeling even more alone. 

I knew stepping out of my comfort zone was an important step for me to stretch and grow.   As uncomfortable as it was, I did just that. I decided to invite some girls over to my house for a craft night. Two I knew pretty well and two I didn’t. I wasn’t sure if anyone would really come but they all came! We ended up crafting, eating yummy food and talking till one in the morning! We made it a weekly thing and now we usually don’t go a day without talking. These girls have helped me so much on my journey. I love how we are all different, with different talents and abilities. It makes for a great team when you need to be built up. I need them. I needed them to get out of my rut and I feel so blessed to have them in my life. I also realized this with all of my Instagram friends! Women need women. I strongly believe that.  We are here to listen, empathize and build each other up. 

My Pink Box was dreamt up one night having a conversation with Meg, on how important it is to do what you love and be surrounded by those who build you up.  You don’t need to go through dark times alone. She too has been on some dark road(s) (click here for her story)  We strongly believe that creating thoughtful spaces, friendships and moments is key to a beautiful life.  Our hope is to bring you beauty, joy and a little magic one pink box at a time!

Never forget, you are so very loved and needed!

Pinky promise! 

Hugs,

Lu 

PS You can find my personal account over at @lifesfrostings

 

 

One of my favorite quotes:

“For what it’s worth: It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over.”

-F Scott Fitzgerald

March 02, 2022 — Megan Clark